“Report of food on the stove.”

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For years, reporters in the WHAM 1180 radio newsroom in Rochester, New York, documented the wackiest emergency calls overheard on the police scanner:


Report of food on the stove.”

Regarding stolen car, the pastor was driving around, said the Lord told him to take a right. Sure enough, there it was.”

COP: “My computer won’t let me code this out.” DISPATCHER: “No problem. You fight crime, I’ll type.”

Apparently the female keeps bothering him. He wants to hurt her is she won’t stop bothering him.”

Call about some metal shavings behind the Salvation Army. If they turn out to be gold shavings, I’ll take care of the evidence.”

Broad and Fitzhugh for some dancin’ in the street.”

Naked intox telling the complainant… well… unintelligible things.”

530 pounds and she looks like a boy.”

DISPATCHER: “Says he’s drunk and his face is busted.” COP: “10-4 for the busted face intox.”

Call for a vicious dog. She owns the dog, but apparently it’s not letting her into her own basement.”

Got a call saying the person was unconscious and had been vomiting. When I asked if they were breathing, I got a bunch of giggling, so I guess that means yes.”

Report of a bonfire, also known as a recreational fire.”

Person stuck in the bathtub. They’re not answering.”

Females fighting in the snow out front.”

Okay, now we’re cookin’ with oil.”


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Who Thought This Was a Good Idea?

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For years, reporters in the WHAM 1180 radio newsroom in Rochester, New York, documented the wackiest emergency calls overheard on the police scanner:


She’s got her tongue stuck to a utility pole.”

Wash cloth on fire.”

Driving a lawn mower on fire on the expressway.”

Going for a donut run.”

Complainant will point out the man to deputies. Shouldn’t be hard to miss. He’s the one wearing no pants.”

Man had sexual relations for 10 dollars, and the woman stole 300 dollars from him. He wants the money back.”

In the yard yelling, ‘I WANT MY WOMAN BACK!’ on a cell phone.”

The mother is chasing her with a bat.”

Man stopping at a house claiming he’s Little Richard.”

He claims he doesn’t know the woman. She’s the mother of his children.”

He’s a male, white, but dressed up like a female with a blue jean skirt, high heels and carrying a black purse.”

Black male known for taking stuff from people’s yards, now walking around with a lawn mower.”

Call for a woman bleeding from the check. Must be cheek.”

30-year-old male peein’ all over.”

Are dogs allowed at the hospital?”

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“He is having a fox problem – the animal type.”

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For years, reporters in the WHAM 1180 radio newsroom in Rochester, New York, documented the wackiest emergency calls overheard on the police scanner:


Says she doesn’t want anyone stealing her cigarettes and coffee and putting poison in them.”

Naked man knocking on the back door. Says he was robbed.”

Looked like a cab driver fighting with a couple of people. Then he went back in the bar.”

He says he’s watching the kids while their mother is out of town and the kids are upset because they don’t like him.”

Holding a rosary and taking off his clothing.”

He was bit in the face and he wants an apology.” (moments later a cop heard on the scanner in a soft voice “I’m sorry”)

She’s trying to kill herself with a shoelace.”

A sewer rat, the size of a large cat, hanging out on the stove.”

I think we’re looking for a big, hairy guy called ‘Grinch’.”

Since you were a young animal control officer, you’ve really come a long way.”

He says he is having a fox problem – the animal type.”

Woman assaulted by her son, daughter and husband.”

Man broke into her apartment; is now trying to sell her microwave on the street.”

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“No Weapons Other Than a Purse.”

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For years, reporters in the WHAM 1180 radio newsroom in Rochester, New York, documented the wackiest emergency calls overheard on the police scanner:


 

Where about you is?”

Left the hospital with an IV in his arm.”

Guy is wearing black pants and has a Marge Simpson-like hairdo.”

Male. Hand stuck in a snow blower.”

Man is telling people he’s going to put a needle in their heart.”

Two people fighting. No weapons other than a purse.”

Report of a van with a refrigerator strapped to the top of it and a male riding in the refrigerator.”

Clerk says customer is stuttering and drooling on himself.”

Arrested for harassment. He threw a full cup of soda on an employee of Taco Bell at the drive-thru window.”

They say they’re gonna whup ‘er.”

People arguing and fighting with darts.”

Sunglasses and a Frank Sinatra-style hat.”

Possibly violent male jumping on the car and smashing it.”

The mother hit the daughter in the head with a makeup bag.”

Man found another man going through his refrigerator.”

Man with black shorts and a white t-shirt over his head, laying cones down to block traffic.”

He apparently has a bead up his nose, partially obstructing.”

She’s hearing dead voices and says those dead voices want to kill her.”

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